tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1855423820697358826.post187855503879047702..comments2023-07-30T05:56:26.504-07:00Comments on Poetic License: Reflection and Commentary on News from the Network, Vol. 4, No. 4Daniel Kurlandhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02693638600645230707noreply@blogger.comBlogger3125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1855423820697358826.post-46580545552149711312011-02-08T14:51:04.503-08:002011-02-08T14:51:04.503-08:00Joe is an only child. At 3 months, when my wife we...Joe is an only child. At 3 months, when my wife went back to work, we used to drop him off at my parents house in Arlington. My mom chased Joe around the house with Hop On Pop when he was 3; he used to giggle, "no Hop on Pop!" Like me, he learned to read at 3. At 4, we entered Joe in pre-school, much to my mom's chagrin. When Joe was younger, I was working 60+hours per week in a job that totally frustrated me. I decided to go into teaching largely because I wanted to be more involved in Joe's development.<br /><br />The first education book I read was by B.F. Skinner. Horrible choice! Many of the parenting mistakes I made were based on what I had read in Skinner. I think Skinner's philosophy, Behaviorism, which I tested on Joe, is at the root of Joe's sometimes resistance to learning. In fact, I think Behaviorism is at the root of most problems in education today. I wish I had read Rousseau, or Constructivists such as Dewey, or Bruner first.<br /><br />Joseph is 12 and earned his Black Belt in Tae Kwon Do over the summer -- he was considering quitting with one belt left to go until the entire dojang stepped in to give him extra support. He gets all A's and B's in Honors classes and generally does his homework without prompting, but he always waits until the last minute to start projects. He started playing baseball last year, and we have been taking him to baseball classes to help him get caught up so that he can compete with the 13 year olds -- he drags his feet. Joe plays the saxophone -- he was selected for all county orchestra in 6th grade but refused the opportunity, and won't practice unless we demand that he does. "I want to be average," he told me today; in the same breath, he bragged that he sits 1st chair in the 2nd band.<br /><br />Joe generally fits the profile of being "ignorant of what is in [his] best interest." I know that his frontal cortex won't be fully myelinated until well into his 20's. (http://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/publications/teenage-brain-a-work-in-progress-fact-sheet/index.shtml) The insurance company has advertised for years that "Executive Function", planning, impulse control, and reasoning, doesn't fully develop until a person is in his mid 20's.<br /><br />We try to balance Joe's need for independence with his need for direction. My position is trust but verify.<br /><br />If there were no parental controls on the computer, Joe would spend 9+ hours on the computer without blinking an eye. Since I blocked Joe's favorite site and tightened up the parental controls substantially, his behavior has improved.<br /><br />Joe replied to the question about what interests him, "I have no interests." He seems content to sit in front of the computer. Therefore, I have limited his computer / electronic time in hopes that he learns other ways to have "fun."Daniel Kurlandhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02693638600645230707noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1855423820697358826.post-66088934232450511462011-02-01T10:43:06.685-08:002011-02-01T10:43:06.685-08:00You have asked the toughest question, known to man...You have asked the toughest question, known to man! The toughest job on the planet, is being a good parent--being president of the United States, is a piece of cake in comparison. I wish I had a good answer for you. Here is what counsel I can give, for a 12 year old, not knowing you or him and your circumstances--happy marriage, siblings, etc:<br /><br />For the most part, treat and talk to him as he were an adult, no kids stuff. Ask him lots of questions about his aspirations and likes and dislikes, his hero figures and WHY? Always WHY?<br /><br />Be alert to what he reads, his friends--peer influence can be devastating to his ultimate well-being. The quickest that I know of to ruin a child, is to cater to them and give them what they want.<br /><br />The problem with almost all human beings, is they are ignorant of what is in their best interest.<br /><br />That's it, in brief and best regards,<br /><br />MaxMax Weismannhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02461338802201367403noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1855423820697358826.post-40706960868429423652011-01-31T10:28:05.722-08:002011-01-31T10:28:05.722-08:00Thank you for commenting on my blog! I ordered the...Thank you for commenting on my blog! I ordered the videos and look forward to wrestling with, learning, and sharing Adler's methods.<br /><br />Currently, I'm reading Endangered Minds, which explores ways that electronic media affects young learners. The author contends that overexposure to electronic media changes young brains, decreasing motivation, creativity, self-control, etc. I've been noticing these problems with my 12 year old son and have begun gradually pulling the plug. Good grades are not good enough. I'm searching for ways to prod my son to ask more questions, to be more reflective, to develop a sense of empathy, to develop a sense of adventure, to be more creative. How do the great ideas compete with the addiction to immediate gratification?Daniel Kurlandhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02693638600645230707noreply@blogger.com